During an interview you are both the product and the sales representative selling the product. It can feel very personal and upsetting when rejected and turned down following a job interview. Often you walk away disappointed and even wanting to throw in the towel. But before you give up on your dreams and settle for any job that will pay the bills, take some time to evaluate the interview, your abilities and your fit with the company and see what you learn. Below are some positive gems that come from rejection and loss.

DO TAKE IT PERSONALLY - If you have been turned down after an interview do take it personal. If at all possible, find out why you were not chosen for the position. It could be due to circumstances presently out of your control such as business or economic reasons, your lack of a specific skill or experience, or not having the required level of education.  

The best thing to do is use what you learn to motivate, inspire, and propel yourself to greatness. If you have been turned down for a position because of a lack of skill, knowledge, or experience don’t feel hurt over missing out on the position. Instead, find out what skills are expected in that field and decide to how to improve what you have to offer. Take additional classes or programs to earn necessary certifications. Go back to school if you need to complete your GED, Bachelors or Masters to obtain the job you are seeking. Or be willing to take a more basic job in the same field to gain the experience sought for your dream position.  

BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF – Does your resume do its’ job and get you interviews but you still never move passed the first round interviews? If it wasn’t a lack of skills or experience and it was something about you personally, be honest with yourself and find out what is holding you back. Maybe it is your interview skills or it is your verbal or non-verbal communications skills, or maybe it is your ego? Whatever the issue, be willing to do what it takes to make the necessary changes to correct the things that are holding you back from the success that you deserve. 

Find a good friend that is willing to be honest with you even if it hurts or try hiring an interview or career coach. There are an array of quality behavioral assessments also available that help clarify your strengths and weaknesses. A professional coach will be able to evaluate your interview skills, communication skills and other behavioral traits to identify the areas in need of improvement. The good thing about weaknesses is that they can always be strengthened – don’t give up! 

It might be that you have the qualifications for the job but you just didn’t fit well with the hiring manager or the company’s environment. It is better to learn of ill fitting partnerships before accepting a job. Not all businesses will be the right fit and you won’t always hit it off with everyone you meet. Again, an assessment can help you to understand what type of environment you prefer to work in.  

WHAT ARE YOUR OPTIONS - With rejection you basically have two options. You can learn from the rejections that you face with during any professional career, find something positive about the experiences and use those gems to improve yourself, your circumstances and ultimately your success. Having a mapped out plan for your job search can help you stay focused on positive goals and keep you moving forward so that you don’t dwell on just the negative aspects of rejection. 

Or you can be rejected and crawl in a hole, never to be seen again. OK, maybe this option is a bit drastic but you understand what I mean. Don’t let rejection overtake your goals and dreams. If you do, you will go through life being miserable and making others around you miserable because you have given up on yourself. 

LEARN AND GROW - Sometimes it is your maturity level that is playing a part in your not getting the job. This too will take time to develop. Usually rejection will develop and increase your maturity level by helping you see many different sides of situations. In just a few years when you look back at what you thought you knew, you will realize how much you still had to learn. Rejections, life lessons and time will increase your maturity and make the successes you encounter much more rewarding. Know it will occasionally hurt as you go through your trials, but that you will come out ahead if you stay focused. 

Most important remember that success is an attitude, a state-of-mind. Optimism spreads to all aspects of your life when you focus on positive things. Even in the worst of situations, something positive will be seen when you look at events the right way. In all your interview rejections, failed meetings, turned down phone calls, missed promotions and even firings or layoffs take the positive gems learned with you each are what help you grow, mature, succeed and live. 

ENJOY YOUR SUCCESS - Don’t give up after the first interview rejection or because of what other people tell you. Look at the famous people who didn’t give up and led extraordinary lives including Helen Keller, Thomas Edison, Abe Lincoln, or Oprah. Work to make yourself the best you can be for the position you want. Remember that anything worth having is worth working for. If you want the position you can make it happen, find out what you need to do and devise a plan to achieve it. Don’t give up on your dreams or yourself. Expect great things.